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Hi,
I have a few questions about wording my release questions or goals.
Thank you again in advance.

(1)
When I release the three wants, I basically use the three default words, approval, control and security. I sometimes feel other words or wording fit better to the situation. For example, I often feel "I want to be in control" rather than "I want to control." Sure, they basically mean the same thing, but they have slightly different "feels" (Probably former is more about my mental state and the latter is about the situation/things). Is it better to search for the right wording or sticking to "approval, control, security" are good enough/could be better?

(2) The second question is about negation/negative wording. It is said that the subconscious doesn't understand "negative" and we should always use positive wording. The Sedona method talks about "wanting to be controlled" for example, and possibly it is to avoid saying "wanting not to control." But sometimes "wanting not to control" fits better to the situation (though they could mean the same thing) and I wonder if I should still avoid using that.

By the way, This "the subconscious doesn't understand negative" thing confuses me a lot because Hale says not to use "I allow myself to stop smoking" because the  subconscious only understands "smoking" and recommends to use "allow myself to be a non-smoker." Sure, "non-smoker" is a positive word as a whole, but does the subconscious understand the "non" part? I also wonder about "disease-free" or words like that... 

Anyway, any input, thoughts on these would be most appreciated and I hope my questions are useful to other members as well. 

Thank you.

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1 and 2: release all of them, and any other wording that shows up

"By the way, This "the subconscious doesn't understand negative" thing confuses me a lot"

It's about the picture, not the words. Can you picture a non-smoker, maybe someone you know?

Thank you Mario.
Your answer made it so much clear about negative wording for me.

Just to make sure about it...
So everything is about how you visualize the sentence, correct?
Now please read the following sentences.
(I'm not a smoker so I'll use pain as an example :) )

(1) I allow myself to have a pain-free body.
(2) I allow myself to not have any pain in the body.
(3) I allow myself to have no pain in the body.

I suppose (1) is OK because I can picture a pain-free body. (2) is probably a no-no because my image is "having pain." But how about (3)? It is grammatically almost the same as (2) but the image from "have no pain" is same as "painless (1)." So it should be OK?
If so, it is not really about "negative grammar," is it?

I know I don't have to make my wording complicated like these and there is easier wording but I want to ask this so that I can be sure about this topic.

Thanks again.     



Mário [Hootless Crew] said:

1 and 2: release all of them, and any other wording that shows up

"By the way, This "the subconscious doesn't understand negative" thing confuses me a lot"

It's about the picture, not the words. Can you picture a non-smoker, maybe someone you know?

"I allow myself to have a perfectly healthy body"

Yes, it would probably work for any health issues, but when I have a headache (for example) it would feel a bit too general. Also my question is to clarify about the topic so I put some not so simple sentences :)

Silence said:

"I allow myself to have a perfectly healthy body"

Oh, thank you! It is exactly kind of a thing I was wondering about.
Now I'm not really sure what wording is OK again...
If pain free provokes pain because the subconscious focuses on the word "pain", then I don't know why "non-smoker" is OK. Wouldn't the subconscious focuses on the "smoker" part? If image is more important as Mario says, then should "pain free" be OK because at least I visualize a body without pain?

Some other examples would be spot-less skin, age-less body etc. And come to think of it, how about words such as unlimited? Wouldn't the mind focus on "limited?"

(BTW the questions above is for everyone - not (just) for Silence)

Silence said:

I'm not a master of any sort, just did the Health and Fitness course offered by the Release Technique and they mentioned that if you use "pain free" to correct a health issue you are focusing on the pain and not to do it.  just a passing thought

"But how about (3)? It is grammatically almost the same as (2) but the image from "have no pain" is same as "painless (1)."

You picture a body with pain, not the "no" or "not".

Picture instead a body that is perfect for you. "I allow myself to have a body that is perfect for me with ease". Thinking about wording exists to distract you from releasing.

Hi Mario,

OK...so
(1) Is it better to avoid wording like "-less," "-free" altogether then? And I hate to sound like a "difficult student," but why is "non-smoker" OK? I can see there is no better way to describe "(someone) not to smoke" but "non-smoking" or "non-smoker" evokes an image of smoking first to me. Since I don't smoke it is a theoretical question but it's not clear to me...

(2) Often it's difficult to visualize "a healthy body" when my body is actually having sickness/difficulties. For example I have a bad rash, and since I can see the rash right here in my body, it is difficult to imagine a healthy skin without rash(plus I'm not good at visualizing things). It is especially difficult when there is severe pain or itch. So I tend to resort to words, like "I allow this headache to be gone" etc. But it is not really effective, right? Any suggestions?     


Thank you again.


Mário [Hootless Crew] said:

"But how about (3)? It is grammatically almost the same as (2) but the image from "have no pain" is same as "painless (1)."

You picture a body with pain, not the "no" or "not".

Picture instead a body that is perfect for you. "I allow myself to have a body that is perfect for me with ease". Thinking about wording exists to distract you from releasing.

Lester: “When we go into this instrument called the mind we discover that the mind is only creative... the mind doesn't understand the word not, the mind works on picture thinking. When I say the word table, everyone gets a picture of a table, they don't get a picture of the word t-a-b-le... if I say "not-shoe" you're thinking not, the picture of the shoe, and you will create a shoe”


That's it in a nutshell, it's very simple, the mind thinks in pictures.

Remember the main point of the goals and practice in general is to release feelings that are brought up around any subject.

To reiterate, it is not about the words. Mario: "Thinking about wording exists to distract you from releasing." If you feel a headache and there is wanting to control, etc. etc. the experience is right there for you to work with. Turning that into a goal so that you can then concern yourself with wording the goal is a trick to avoid what is right there. Your mind will give you theoretical examples to see how it might apply to situations, but it's not necessary, because when a situation is right here right now, the feelings are right there. I would suggest you go by whatever stirs up emotional material in you to release because that will keep you releasing, and not worry about the semantics of it, as long as it brings up 'wanting' you are good to go.

If you have a symptom like the rash or headache, it is a good opportunity to release all the emotional stuff that comes up around it -- wanting to control it, resisting it, etc. -- it is normal for it to be too much of a "leap" to picture a perfect body. I would say that in the case where symptoms or difficulties are present, you've got everything you need right there. That is a great thing to work on with someone as partner release or a free call because it will get you right into the practice on it.

As you continue to release whatever comes up you may find it becomes more possible to picture a healthy body etc but you don't need to force it. Just work with whatever is coming up, even if the most dominant thing is confusion and not sure what to do or what to work on, behind that is a certain emotion, wanting. Hopefully this makes it more direct when our mind sinks its teeth into the mechanics of the different techniques we learn.

more direct approach:

-sensation is felt

-this sensation feels unpleasant

-am i welcoming or resisting this sensation

-which of the three wants is coming up 

-release

indirect:

-sensation is felt

-sensation is called 'headache' and everything we associate with it. Mind is now really engaged

-'oh i have a headache, i don't like headaches, i get them a lot, i need to figure out this headache issue'

-'what's a good goal statement around headaches'

etc. it is possible to never actually release anything during this

if there are no symptoms, just keep it simple, connect to what you want your body to feel like. The words will come if they need to if not just be with the feeling right here right now of feeling good. If you're just feeling good and not even too concerned with a goal that's even better. 

Thank you Evan. I much appreciate the time and effort you took to reply for me.
I am now much more clear about it. I did forget about the main point of having a statement - to bring up feelings.

Anyway...a little bit more about my symptoms.

(Headache)
Yes, I do have occasional headaches. It happens only occasionally but it has been difficult to make a statement because I'm usually healthy so an "I have a healthy body" statement doesn't really do much(I feel like I am stating the obvious because I usually forget about having headaches, and I don't feel having the rash is "unhealthy"). The problem has been when it actually happens and I can't really imagine my body without a headache when I do have a headache if you know what I mean. But I will do the "direct approach" you mentioned and forget about the goal statement.

(rash)
I have a skin rash with occasional itch. Actually after I started releasing itch has been reduced and recently I don't have it much(gain!), but the rash is still there. So I first tried to "welcome" it and decide to not think of it for a while and welcomed the sensation when it did itch, but after a month or so it was still there. Then I tried to release "wanting to control it" or "wanting it to be gone" but hasn't worked. Maybe visualization of a healthy skin could work but I can't "un-see" the rash when I visualize/picture.        
So for the headache I'll do the direct approach you mentioned. For the rash maybe I haven't been able to release well...I'll try more welcoming and letting go of wanting to change it.

By the way, I didn't really get what you meant by "indirect." Did you mean if my mind just went through these (without actively trying to release), releasing doesn't really happen there? 

I'd like to add about "picturing" or "visualizing" too. I would imagine it's not only me, but I'm not a "visual person" and it's difficult to mentally picture something(e.g. can't even picture a "regular car") . Often negative images get in a way when trying to picture something good(e.g.my skin example - can't unsee the rash) .Also, I get concerned about details.(e.g. visualize a "perfect relationship" - what should I be doing in the picture with the person??).
It's slightly off topic but if anyone has any advice on it it would be great.     

Be glad you have found a practice like releasing because it does not require you to hold the picture of anything via effort. 

Don't worry about it, just release the wants around a subject and the "picture" (your feelings, thoughts, energy in relationship to that subject) will shift. 

When you try to forcefully picture something when it is unnatural because 1) you can't access it or 2) you are not naturally visual it is basically just fighting with yourself. 

I would imagine this is part of why there is no visualizing in the 6 steps. 

I've had friends in my life who are blind or never had sight. Many amazing things in their lives. Also think of all the things that have happened in your life that you didn't visualize. That you didn't know existed. Did any of us 'visualize' that we would find teachers and learn about inner work that can end suffering? "Picturing" to mean only a visual thing is a misunderstanding and overrated, the feeling is far more important, and visualizing to me is largely about using whatever tools to bring up anything that has wanting, contraction around it. 

When you clear yourself up emotionally everything is free to flow in and out of your life perfectly, which it does, better than what our egos will tell us we should be 'visualizing.' The caterpillar can not visualize being a butterfly, life takes it somewhere beyond what it could imagine. 

This is why it is so important to consistently remind yourself: 
Releasing practices are to resolve the wanting and end suffering
they are not a 'manifestation technique' in order to try to control the world

This is way of interpreting releasing vs. the other strikes at the heart of almost every question you have asked. When the purpose is to uncover wanting and let it go, then it is clear that the priority of whatever it is, wording a goal, looking at a goal in the first place, whether we can visualize or not, is all about uncovering the wanting. Things get a lot more simple (does it bring up wanting or not), self verifiable (you know whether or not it stirs up wanting) and less and less about some thing you need to concern with doing "correctly" in order to get a specific result.

It cuts through all of it but remember your mind does not like the simplicity of that. It doesn't want to just uncover the wanting and release it all day. It would prefer a large and complicated discussion about all the specific ratios of how much to visualize vs how much to release while saying mantra x but not y, because the minds job is to abstract reality and explain it in models so it can describe things, the more details the better, and never reaches a point where it feels it has enough information. 

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