Reclaiming Energy - To Frank

[Mário [Hootless Crew]]

"I found that interesting because it brings up a good point (probably better in another thread), which is why not reclaim that energy. Did all that releasing I did this past weekend sap my energy level?"

I read that in the thread about how did you know about the method. The answer is no. You reclaim your energy every time you release.
You use your energy to suppress emotions. That's the sapping. What is the highest level of sapping? Apathy. You use so much energy to bury the garbage so deeply, that there´s no energy left for you. As Lester said: Apathy is Sapathy. It saps your energy.
When you release, suppressed garbage goes and the energy used to suppress it is available to you again.

Mário

[Frank]

Thanks Mario. I am just seeing your answer here to my question (in another thread) regarding releasing wants and emotions being the same as releasing our own personal energy. Your response certainly makes a whole lot of sense.

[Lisa [Hootless Crew]]

Interesting Mario, I have a recent example of this - I have just experienced a huge nose dive into acute apathy and grief after a prolonged balanced and extremely happy period of many months. It has been a very odd experience just falling right back down there actually, and so sharply. I just seemed to want to sleep and sleep, no tears or anything like that, just a feeling of complete emptiness.....the exact opposite from a period of high energy and hardly needing any sleep at all, that I had recently experienced, albeit a period of time where I didn't concentrate on releasing as much as I normally would!

I have been through the old 'wanting to figure out why this happened' and what the trigger or cause is. I have reached a level of acceptance that I know everything is ok and that I know what to do to with this. However, it is tempting to want to analyse what else is going on. That is, what emotions is my mind trying to surpress that obviously need to be let go of instead.

Incredibly, when I was fortunate enough to have a session with Fabrizio a few nights ago, we worked in rounds and the waves of stuff coming to the surface for me seemed stronger and more frequent than I have experienced in releasing for a very long time.

I am grateful that there is even more stuff wanting to leave now, when we reach an equalibrium it is so easy to forget that there maybe more to come. For me this is where having releasing 'buddies' or a coach is so valuable :)

[lilar]

Lisa: First of all let me tell you that I missed your messages and I was just about to start a thread looking for you lol A few days ago when I was listening to one of Hale's CDs, I heard him saying something very interesting. He said that our mind often focuses on bad emotions. For example we are feeling positive and a lot of good things are happening in our lives and then if we feel a bad emotion for some reason or another, our mind magnifies it and we forget all about the good things that we have felt so far and instead focuse only on that one single negative emotion. Then we start wondering why this emotion came up, what we did wrong, what we should do to let it go and never come back again.. etc... I found this very interesting as it completely relates to my experience. Instead of welcoming the feeling of apathy and moving on, I often want to figure things out. In the past, before the SM, I used to create beliefs out of that single emotion such as: I will always be miserable, I will always be unhappy, I don't know why we have been created, there is too much suffering in this world and the beliefs go on and on and my mind makes them appear more and more real. Now, thank God, I usually stop in noticing the emotion but some times my minds plays his favorite tricks and I hear myself saying: "I guess I'm not making any progress, releasing is not that efficient, ...." Then I catch myself in time and just smile.
It's just amazing how releasing has changed my reactions. The old patterns are still there but there is less identification with them.
How are you feeling now Lisa?

[Mário [Hootless Crew]]

"I have been through the old 'wanting to figure out why this happened' and what the trigger or cause is. I have reached a level of acceptance that I know everything is ok and that I know what to do to with this. However, it is tempting to want to analyse what else is going on."

Trying to find meaning makes it more real. It is not real, and there's really no meaning. Actually, there's one meaning: this is the next piece that came up to be released.
This is something Hale talks about explicitely and Larry implicitely/explicitely: The mind gets you by trying to find meaning. Because then you have to hold on to it until you invent a meaning that you like. And when you create a meaning you like, it says "but what about...?" Until you release and then you think you found a meaning or just don't care anymore.
Everything that happens to "us" is meaningless. It is just what is, doesnt matter how seemingly horrible.

Mário

[Lisa [Hootless Crew]]

Hi guys (and girls) ;) - I have been on hols Lilar and so gave everything a complete break for a few weeks. Lilar thanks for missing me darling - that is so appreciated - bless you for saying that. I am feeling ok by the way, a mixture of moving up a level in my Holosync and also as Mario rightly says:

'Trying to find meaning makes it more real. It is not real, and there's really no meaning. Actually, there's one meaning: this is the next piece that came up to be released'.....I caught myself in it and turned it around to being grateful that a big stir up was ocurring and that a huge piece of the jigsaw was revealing itself to be released. Witnessing what the body/mind is feeling in the now is very powerful. We are indeed so lucky to know what is happening and can step back and watch....welcome, dive in and just be with the feelings as they surface.

I recall what you say about Hale talking about the fact that our minds do indeed focus on bad emotions. An easy way I find to explain this is by use of our writing down our gains. By doing this we are actually focusing on all the good things that have come our way, whereas with non-releasers (I see this with non releasing friends) all they focus on is the bad things they perceive are happening or that they get. It is after all just a decision which way to focus our attention.

Similarly with emotions as you said:

'For example we are feeling positive and a lot of good things are happening in our lives and then if we feel a bad emotion for some reason or another, our mind magnifies it and we forget all about the good things that we have felt so far and instead focus only on that one single negative emotion.'

So, in effect writing a simple gains list reverses this. In light of this, I have started keeping an 'emotions' journal and noting down all the good things that I feel day to day. I have done this for one week so far, but, the interesting thing is that even though my mind (thankyou for helping) was focusing on the bad stuff, over all the number of good emotions and hours I had been feeling this week far out-weighed any down turn. Proof enough for me that as Hale said our lovely minds magnify the bad emotion and focus only on that.

I would be interested if anyone else finds any benefit from this too, as I found it quite powerful. I simply do a daily review before sleep (journal it) and then do an end of day release on the whole thing.....

[lilar]

Lisa: I do have a journal on which I report my gains. When I was meditating I used to keep a journal and sometimes I read those journals. While meditation helped me a lot in managing my emotions, still my major focus was on bad things. I started a releasing journal about two months ago and when I read some of it, it shows the progress I made as far as focusing on positive things. Very rarely do I mention something went wrong. As for the gains I never fail to find some. Never!

[Mário [Hootless Crew]]

One thing I heard Guy Finley say was that as our egos are separated from Love/Beingness, they don't have access to love so they can feed on it. So they "learned" to feed on the wants, because once they were separated, wanting to be One and Separate were there for it to feed.
Egos don't know Love or positive. They can "know", as an example of positive, this weird thing women (more than men) like to see in movies that is also called love. But this romantic love is all about the wants, and that's what egos like. It is about wanting to be safe, so you don't lose what you think is giving love to you. It is about wanting to control, where the person can only relate romantically with you and nobody else, so they don't find something more interesting and you lose them, going back to the previous point. It is about wanting to get love and approval from other people, mistaken what we feel when we open up and feel OUR LOVE FOR THEM as being they loving us. And what about marriage? We take it as being "proof of love", but it is a way to control and also diminish our fear of losing the other person. And also complying with society, and women tend to suffer more than men with that. Why do people stay in ruined relationships, trying to force it to work? Why do people think that having a child is a solution to broken relationships? Why do women like bad boys and say they want nice ones? Why do men want more and more women? Ego, ego, ego, want, want, want.
Nothing against any of that. I even enjoy girls flicks now (except for the last 15 minutes). But even when we are talking about things that would be considered positive like love, romance, etc... the egos are still not looking for those positive attributes. And if we don't look at the reality behind them, we can't release.
The egos couldn't focus on bad stuff if the bad stuff weren't already there. Having a positive journal is great to disarm the ego, like when it says "Releasing doesn't work" you get our journal and read it and say "see, it works". So you get the lie and release it spontaneously. It is a great way of, as Larry says, "get bigger than your ego". Egos won't care about the positive, but they shut up long enough so we can Be Here for a while.

Mário

[Lisa [Hootless Crew]]

Mario - I have to say that was a cool way of describing 'love'. I was having a conversation about this with some dear releasing friends last night. Where 'human love' is all about wants as you say - what can you do for me in return? FEAR of losing them. CONTROL in so many ways as you say. The oscillation between wanting seperation and oneness. JEALOUSY, PRIDE, SECURITY, APPROVAL - oh my it's all in there in 'relationship' isn't it? The trying to hold on to something and thus influence the path of another to satisfy your own wants and desires.... it's an endless list. And as we all know when we try to hold on to something too much - it is the very thing that eludes us.....let it go or as the old saying goes that has alot of truth in it "If you truly love someone, set them free.....etc etc"

We agreed that real love is something far more pure and almost an innocent energy, where we can reach a place where we are happy that the other person is happy, and even if that involves them not being with us then that is ok. Sounds impossible for non-releasers but it is a possibility when we can open up enough for that to be the case. Then a partnership works, there is no pressure, it is open and kind with both wanting the very best for the other person.

Jealousy is one of the most destructive emotions as anyone that has either felt it or experienced it from another person will tell you. It rots a relationship to the core and all stems from wanting control I guess.....

As for marriage - it is too much of a committment for many to sign up for life....I know I could not do this! I could maybe do a year at a time though LOL - which is why 'handfasting' the druid ceremony is great, and makes much sense as everything can change in 12 months dramatically as we all know.

This is proving to be a very interesting conversation - long may it continue and thanks Frank for starting it :)

[lilar]

Lisa and Mario: What's wrong with marriage? loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool

[Mário [Hootless Crew]]

Hehehe. You know, I have to say, when you are really serious about finding the wizard behind the curtain, there will be a lot of things we might not want to see. Our appearant world, or "the appearance" as is sometimes called, is dedicated to cultivate the ego. So everywhere you look, even the most benign thing, is dedicated to cultivate separation and strenghten the FEELING of being a person and all the wants that come with that. Why? Because it is just a feeling, a very false sense of reference in reality, that can rapidly crumble when looked at directly.Even charity, wanting to help, when done by a "person", it is done to make the person feel better. I feel better when I help, so I help. Real selfless acts can only be done when ego is not involved.
Everything that happens in the appearance is evaluated according to "What does that mean about me?". It is an unconscious thought and we only see/feel the effects of it, unless we are aiming at seeing it.
I recently became aware of something I really didn't want to see. What is behind daydreaming and fantasizing. I awoke in the middle of a daydream and saw that the reason I like it is because it gave me the feelings I want to have when that manifests in "reality". For instance, when I fantasize about meeting a girl and successfully having the planned outcome, whatever it is :) , I am getting from the fantasy the approval I think I will get from her in "reality", and that feels so good that I want more of that, thus increasing my wanting approval. That's what they all do, they increase the wants. And I don't want that real girl, I want those feelings I expect to have from the experience according to what my mind played to me. And that's why the mind will never be satisfied.
This realization frees a lot of stuff, but at the same time I like fantasizing, so there's a feeling of losing something, even though nothing is lost, only gained.
The same goes for Freedom, and we fantasize abot being Free and how good that will feel, and how much approval I will give myself for getting there successfully, and all the bliss and extasy of being One and safe, etc... ALL of this blocks our path, even though it feels really good.
I am reading Jed Mackenna's book Elightenment: The damnest Thing, and this first book is about how what we think enlightenment is and how it is supposed to feel is blocking our "getting there"(here).
On the other hand, if you could only Love that person "targetted" for marriage, without any insecurity and feeling of losing them, without any wanting to control them, WITHOUT WANTING THEM TO FULFILL THE FANTASIES YOU HAVE ABOUT THAT AND BEING AS YOU EXPECT THE TO BE "if they really love me", even if they want an "open marriage" (that's a cool concept :) )... knowing that you will still feel the same way or better be them with you or not, how much better would that relationship be to you? Oh, yes, I am fantasizing again.

Mário

[lilar]

Mario: Your message is a masterpiece and I measure my words. It is a masterpiece because it rings so true to me!!!!!! That 's what I have been doing all my life especially before I got married . And you are right it's not the person, it's rather the want of approval and also the want of control and underneath them all the want of security that provoque those fantasies. And once we realise that a whole wall of beliefs crumbles down. It's just amazing!!!
Thank you Mario!!!!

[Lisa [Hootless Crew]]

Brilliant post Mario - I cannot follow that Lilar....except to add that I agree about the cool concept of an open marriage - and that there is nothing wrong with marriage at all for those that it works for. For me it would be like a prison sentence.....in fact I am going to do some STL's (Squeeze the Lemon) pairs - just for effect and to bring up some wants - ;)

Imagine never ever being able to stay with one person for a long time in relationship, never getting married, never finding the so called security of that?
Whichever wants it brings up, welcome them and let them dissolve!

Now, imagine always having to stay married, to the same person, no matter what, you can never break free of them, they are always there for the rest of your life there will be no other? (Ouch)
Whatever want that stirs up....welcome it all and let it all go.