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Enigma of wanting - do we release wants so that we actually get what we want?

Hi,
I understand that in the Sedona method/releasing, "wants" means lack and we release it. But it is often explained that "we release wants so that we can actually get/have it" and it is apparently very contradictory. For example, in the Sedona method book Hale talks about the guy who couldn't find something but then used the method and released wanting to find it then he actually found it. But he wouldn't have used the method if he really hadn't cared about finding it. The same idea applies to goal setting etc.

If you actually don't care about something, you don't really get it even when you are "imperturbable" about it (except by accident). For example, I am happy with my car even though it is old and not super nice. I don't "want" a newer or nicer car. So in a way I am "imperturbable" about it. But it does not mean I will get a newer and nicer car. Do you understand what I'm trying to say? To get a newer. nicer car, it seems like I should first "want" it then let go the want.

It's a bit confusing to say the least. It seems like you actually first have to "want" something and then release the want so that you can actually get/have it.

I read somewhere it is not really a "want" but an intention. For example, you could say when you are away from home and decide to go home, you have an intention of going home but it's not a "want." But to me it is just playing with words....you do want to go home otherwise you wouldn't intend to go home....or is it actually a matter of wording?

Any thoughts or input would be appreciated.

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This subject comes up very regularly and it's very easy to spin into a lot of theories. 

One of the clearest distinctions to me that ended this seeming conflict is understanding that you "want" a feeling that you think you can only get by getting this thing. 

Why does someone want a million dollars- because they love the piece of paper that is money or the look of the numbers on the bank account? No. If I had money then I could do x y z or feel safe, be out of debt, which would make me feel x. 

Through inner work you begin to see that the feeling lives in you and the projection onto the object can begin to fade away. 

So, you 'want' the feeling of a thing, which you can get via letting go around the feelings of lack, even if that specific object that you projected it onto does not actually show up. 

This, in my experience, is how one truly becomes "hootless" about a subject. You can't possibly be imperturbable about money if the genuine belief/experience is that it is impossible to feel any sense of safety or security without lots of money. Once the feeling is separated from the object through practice, it is actually possible to be truly OK whether or not you have the thing, because you see the thing for exactly what it is. 

As far as things coming in as a result, I have experienced this many times as have many here, sometimes in crazy ways that would make a fantastic LOA testimonial. 

Similarly, what cut to the chase for me was seeing it more as a clearing of the territory. You have taken the weeds out of the soil. That particular thing might not actually show up (nor do you have the same projection onto the meaning of it showing up), but if it is in its nature to do so, there is nothing in you pushing it away. It's free to come in now. It doesn't mean it MUST. It was James Hurley who said to me years ago on a Hootless call, that if you look at your own experience, there are plenty of things in your life that you have no attachments and no aversions to, that do not appear in your life. 

Mario has said a few times here something I've found coming out in one form or another as well- as soon as you get into "I've released x y z, why hasn't my thing shown up?" it is the height of wanting control. It is perceiving a method designed to bring you emotional freedom by recognizing the truth of who you are and the happiness that is your nature and turning it into a manifestation technique in order to get things to make you happy, which is ironically far from the spirit of it. But this is very natural and can itself be used for great material to release if you stick with it and just be honest about what is coming up for us at any given moment. 

Hi Evan,

Thank you for your detailed reply. It did clear up a lot of things for me. I realize similar questions come up regularly here or in other websites/forums etc. but I never truly understood it although I was coming close to understanding what you have described. Your reply has been very helpful to clear up my thoughts and understand it deeper.

However all that said I still don't understand it 100%. Here is what still confuses me. A lot of (known) sages don't actually care about material possessions. They are happy as they are, as things are. So they are truly "hootless." and it seems like not many things appear in their lives and some are even poor. Actually Hale mentioned something about it at the BATGAP interview and said something to the effect of the Sedona method being the bridge between this(enlightened but materially poor) and LOA which focuses on materializing things and worldly success. 

Anyway it seems like if you're truly hootless and has "no aversion" and "no attachments" about anything like these sages, it seems like things don't really appear (but you don't truly care about it). But some (apparently) enlightened or realized people do have material success as well. What makes the difference? What would be the difference between these (materially) "poor" sages and Lester (for example) when he manifested many things? And when Lester manifested materials etc.(A million dollars, an expensive car etc.), if it is not a "want" what is it??     

Hope you understand where I'm stuck when it comes to understanding this whole thing.  

Our minds want there to be a concrete thing you can say "this person has material success and this one doesn't, so there must be some specific, repeatable, clear reason why he does and he doesn't" - usually implied is so that I can make sure I'm like the one who has material success. Eventually roads lead to, ultimately what we want is happiness, the only reason we want material things is because of happiness, so why not focus on happiness and becoming free of our attachments and aversions and see what happens? 

Either way you look at it, your next steps are the same: free yourself of your attachments and aversions. 

There isn't a clear thing to point to. Lester gave that money away but again, who is to say why some do and some don't. Donald Trump seems to do OK with material possessions and not exactly "free" would you say. Why was Mozart a musical genius as a child and why is someone else great at basketball? Why are some drawn towards material success or seem to have it around their lives alot and others have no interest? This is where the 'wanting to control' and 'wanting to figure it out' releasing gets really deep, because it really confronts the minds desire to want to be able to have an answer about this so it can control it. Most of the theories that sound satisfying don't really hold up upon examining reality, and reality wins. 

These areas are where you have to watch when looking for such an understanding is ultimately slowing down your progress from just going forward and letting go of what you need to, making you feel like you need to do something differently based on 'understanding' this-- method and next step forward remains the same :)

There was a thread here "manifesting millions" that comes to the same question, what did one do differently than another? which has responses. 

To your question about it being a "want" you may start to see it more like the nature of someone. You could call it a 'want' that Mozart wrote music or Michael Jordan 'wants' to play basketball but really it is a natural draw. Things have their nature, a dog barks and likes to eat what it eats. Free of attachments/aversions your natural tendencies are free to move uninhibited. You may genuinely enjoy playing the stock market and find it interesting or sit in a cave like Ramana Maharshi. "Be not the doer" as Lester would say it's not really up to some separate person making a choice based on the same type of wanting.

Evan,

Thank you again for your replies.

I do understand what you are trying to tell me. However I ask this question not for just "understanding" it but for practical reasons too. It is as simple as "should I do goal setting?" and as you know the Sedona method does talk about goal setting. To do goal setting, I obviously need a goal and in order to have a goal I should think of my wants first. So should I forget about goal setting or have a goal with a want anyway and release it? This kind of confusion is where my question comes from. 

Goals are great. If you really want something right now, use it for doing a goals process because it will bring up the most stuff! 

We may 'get' the idea of not wanting, but if our right now experience feels like: I want that! It's a great place to go to see everything associated with that desire, and cleanup anything excess around it. The more fully I own what I want, however base or strongly, without trying to spiritualize it, the better the process works for me. 

Evan,

Thank you very much for this conversation! :)

To be honest with you, it seems my wants are suppressed under the idea of "not wanting" or if I "want" something I'm not progressed spiritually. So in a way it is even difficult for me to know my hidden "want." But now I realize it may be something to dig deeper...

I struggled with this a lot too when I was using the Sedona Method Course.   They way I understand it now is when you are imperturbable you can choose, as in intention or direction but not have a stickyness attached to that goal so it flows toward you more freely.  You become imperturbable when you are so released on it you could care less if you have it or not.  Larry's style of teaching was much more direct and what I needed, I found more benefit from his courses.  Everyone is so different, both courses point to the same thign in my experience.

Hi Silence,

Yes what you described seems like what a lot of teachers teach. You become imperturbable and don't care if you have it or not. Then you can "choose" and it is an "intention" or "direction" as you mentioned.

My original question is, aren't these "intention" or "direction" still a want? I mean, if you don't set this "intention" or "direction" and become imperturbable about it, you don't get it (as I mentioned about some sages who don't have anything, or my example about the car).

There will be a (more) chance of getting something if I set something as an intention or direction and release the want. But where does this "intention" or "direction" come from, and how do I distinguish between "intention" and "want.."  Can there be an intention/direction without a want??



Silence said:

I struggled with this a lot too when I was using the Sedona Method Course.   They way I understand it now is when you are imperturbable you can choose, as in intention or direction but not have a stickyness attached to that goal so it flows toward you more freely.  You become imperturbable when you are so released on it you could care less if you have it or not.  Larry's style of teaching was much more direct and what I needed, I found more benefit from his courses.  Everyone is so different, both courses point to the same thign in my experience.

Yes. If you look closely you'll see the wanting is just an energy that comes up. "I shouldn't want, I shouldn't feel this" are all thoughts and interpretation that come up after the fact. Keep the attention on the feeling and you'll keep moving forward. What ever is deeper arises by itself as you continue.

Remember that the 'wanting' in the context of releasing is a feeling of lack, there is suffering and unhappiness in it. There is a distinct, qualitative difference between that lacking feeling vs. an expression of your nature, preferences. Enjoying classical music or grabbing a burger at restaurant A vs B because you like it are an expression, there is no "my life would be so much better with this" pulling at you subconsciously in the background. 

Throw aside the fact that you could use the word "want" there as in I want to go grab a coffee, the energy and what it is actually referring to are very different things. 

Suppose you reach 100% freedom right now, and you are free to have anything you want. No attachments, no aversions. You can have anything right now. What happens next, where do you live, what do you do, what do you eat? That's nature. One will be a dancer and another may sit in a cave. Lester went to Sedona. Others went to a cave and others kept working and maybe made a lot of money. The more you let go, the more you see this is just an arising, it's not really up to you, you didn't decide what foods you like the taste of or what pieces of music speak to you.

Without getting too sidetracked into that, it is unquestionably not the same as the feeling of lack and unhappiness. In a release technique course for example you will bring up the subject until there is no feeling of that lack, until it is complete. The steps remain simple, look into what is arising for you in any moment, is there a feeling of lacking, unhappiness? If so, you know what to do, if not, enjoy. Only the mind would look at a feeling of free-ness, and then going to get a cup of coffee and sit in the park because it feels right and go "but wait, isn't that a WANT for the cup of coffee, isn't wanting bad?" - keep it simple my friend. 

Hi Evan. Thank you. The last reply was the best answer I have ever read about this topic. I always got confused about it because 1:we use the word "want" even when there is no attachment and 2:separating the intention and want has been difficult for me but it is now much, much more clear!

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